Former domestic violence hearing officer shares story of abuse

By Breana Albizu

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    SOCORRO, New Mexico (KOAT) — The holidays are often a time of celebration, but for others, the days are unsettling.

Especially for domestic violence victims.

“It has been emotionally draining for me,” Judy Holcomb said.

When it comes to the overall issue, the experience can be traumatizing.

That’s the case for Holcomb, who said she dealt with domestic abuse for over a decade.

It’s something she never thought she would personally encounter. For 16 years, Holcomb was a domestic violence hearing officer in New Mexico’s Seventh Judicial District.

“My biggest mistake was the fact that I believe that I couldn’t possibly be victimized,” she said.

Yet it all started back in 2004, after Holcomb met a man through an online dating website. It happened just one year after her late husband died.

“I was lonely. I was heartbroken,” she said. “He came into my life and convinced me that he could help me find happiness again.”

Holcomb said the abuse started mentally, then turned physical.

Their relationship then escalated in September 2014 after she was apparently thrown down a stairway. Not once, but three times within a six-hour time span.

According to a report provided by New Mexico State Police (NMSP), responding officers found blood in multiple areas throughout their Socorro home.

The review also mentioned that some blood may have been cleaned up prior to NMSP’s arrival.

Hospital pictures also showed the extent of damage for Holcomb. The mother of 10 was laid unconscious for several hours.

“I remember the overwhelming sense of terror that engulfed me for weeks,” she said. “The terror was worse than the pain, because I knew that he had tried to kill me. He repeatedly told me that I needed to hurry up and die.”

On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by a partner throughout the United States.

Here in New Mexico, 37.6% of women and 33.3% of men experience intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner sexual violence, and/or intimate partner stalking in their lifetimes.

And unfortunately, reports of abuse tend to increase later in the year, particularly during the holidays.

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Lacey had been charged with domestic violence several times before.

That’s why Holcomb wanted to share her own story, for the very first time on television, in hopes others can learn from her past.

“I began to see he was manipulative and deceptive, and as I learned more about his past, I realized he had a history of doing this,” Holcomb said.

Such as when it comes to looking out for certain signs.

“I think the warning signs are generally someone who appears to be at some level not trustworthy, because if someone is dishonest and manipulative, they can manipulate anything,” she said.

Especially for loved ones, who may see situations first-hand.

“I think the important thing to do is continue to provide support,” Holcomb said. “The person you watch being victimized, it may be very frustrating. You may want to just walk away because they’re not listening to you. Don’t leave your loved ones. They need you.”

Since the incident, Holcomb’s partner has not been arrested or charged. However, she is continuing her legal battle against him.

If you or someone you know is in need of help, you can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or visit their website.

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